I wish I was making this up

[Ring Ring]
“Mr Curio?”
“We’ve been going over your pay claims and have noticed that on two days in the past week you didn’t take a lunch break.”
“Yes, that’s right. It’s been really hectic here.”
“It’s an occupational health and safety requirement that all employees work no more than 5 hours without taking at least a half hour break.”
“So we’ll just deduct half an hour from each of those days on your time sheet to account for those breaks.”
“… So … can you add an extra half hour at the end of those days?”
“We will deduct a half hour from each of those days in order to meet the requirements of the system.”
“Is there anything else we can do for you today?”
“…um, no. I feel quite refreshed. Thank you.”
“Not a problem. Thank you.”