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Author Archives: ctcurio
I think they want me to press this button. What do they think I am?
What’d you call me?
Did you ever wonder why people dress like they do in those post-apocalyptic movies? Well wonder no more with this handy guide!
Please be considerate and dress appropriately the next time you go out.
The new dress code
Advice for social distancing
Dance like your webcam is turned off,
love like the trolls never hurt.
Sing like your microphone’s broken,
live from home like it’s heaven on earth.
– Mark Twain (almost)
Social Distancing
First week in lockdown. My house is full of pot plants. Refugees from my once shared office, now abandoned.
The thought crossed my mind this morning, I should name these tiny trees, my new green leafed colleagues. Give them individual identities. Keep me company.
But then I remembered how bad I am with names. What if I forget them? How uncomfortable, to be in the ‘office’ every day, avoiding using proper nouns, for fear of embarrassment. “There s/he is!” “Hey, you!” “I wouldn’t be able to borrow a business card would I?” “Have you met my friend?”
The social anxiety may get too much. I’d have to make excuses for not coming in. Just stay in bed. Under the covers. I think they’re talking about me. I hear their leaves rustling. No, surely not. I’m being paranoid. They don’t care. Nobody talks to me anyway. So impersonal. They don’t even know my name.
